current status...

It's now been a month since my dad died. People ask me how I'm doing, and I'm ok. I have good days and bad days. Fortunately I'm so busy at work that I have very little time to just sit and think, but every now and again I have a slow period, and then it hits me. And some times there are random moments such as when I'm in a cab headed home after dinner with friends where I see his face in my mind, that last image I have of him after he died and he's laying there, and it hurts.

But for the most part, I'm ok. I haven't felt much up to socializing, so I understand the old-fashioned mourning customs where people withdrew from social life after the death of a loved one. It is sometimes difficult for me to be around people that are celebrating something -- I understand their need to celebrate, and that it is a happy occasion. And I'm happy for them, but I'm still grappling with the emotions I have from a sad occasion. And it's not that I don't want to go out and have a good time, it's just that I'm not ready to do that yet.

I have gotten out a bit, walking mostly, and quiet dinners out, so I'll be posting photos again soon. And we are going to the Manchester United game next weekend -- I'm hoping it won't be pouring rain that night.